Hump Day Late Night Thoughts on "Are you driven or is something driving you?" 05/31/12

Almost over the hump and I can only say that night has been quite relaxing after the temperatures dipped below triple digits. There are always fun times when things start to heat up in the Valley of the Sun. So much has happened over the last several weeks and it seems as though I have been a little to busy to stop and reflect on some things putting pen to paper. There have been quite a few thoughts floating around my brain for a little while now, but there seemed to be something missing that didn't allow me to wrap my mind around them. It took a few conversations and listening to my surroundings in order for me to make a little more sense of everything. I believe I started to gain clarity when I couldn't answer this question someone asked me recently; "What is your greatest accomplishment in life thus far?" Believe it or not, I drew a blank on the question. At that point I started question myself and really wondering what is my biggest accomplishment in life thus far. I actually started to look at what have I actually accomplished in life. As I took this deeper I began to see that my accomplishments and my drive were directly related. What is it that drives you? Is it family? People depending on you? Is it success? Is it the fear of failure? As simple as I typed those questions, I had to ask myself to gauge where I was. Before I could even answer those questions, I thought of a couple more questions. Have you ever lost your drive? If so, how do you get it back? How did you lose it? What changed? In many aspects of our lives as we transition to new chapters our focus changes. We place different importance on things than we had in the past and maybe that has an effect on our drive. I mean is there something in the world that you would continue to push forward on in spite of any obstacle in your path? Even if the drive is not present, I do believe that you can still be driven to or driven away from a lot of things in life. Think about the people that are in life and your surroundings, do you think you are at times driven to or driven away from them? What are you driven by? Are you driven by anyone? Are you driven to anything? At the end of the day, I believe that if you are driven to "embrace the #positivemovementsforward lifestyle and be phenomenal," there's nothing that can stop you. So ask yourself one last time, "Am I driven or is something driving me?" “I have been driven many times to my knees by the overwhelming conviction that I had nowhere to go. My own wisdom, and that of all about me, seemed insufficient for the day.” Abraham Lincoln “Good business leaders create a vision, articulate the vision, passionately own the vision, and relentlessly drive it to completion.” Jack Welch “Traditions are the guideposts driven deep in our subconscious minds. The most powerful ones are those we can't even describe, aren't even aware of.” “Success is almost totally dependent upon drive and persistence. The extra energy required to make another effort or try another approach is the secret of winning.” Denis Waitley “A business like an automobile, has to be driven, in order to get results” B. C. Forbes “Enthusiasm releases the drive to carry you over obstacles and adds significance to all you do” Norman Vincent Peale “Many highly intelligent people are poor thinkers. Many people of average intelligence are skilled thinkers. The power of a car is separate from the way the car is driven.” Edward de Bono “To believe in yourself and to follow your dreams, to have goals in life and a drive to succeed, and to surround yourself with the things and the people that make you happy - this is success!” Sasha Azevedo “A man can be as great as he wants to be. If you believe in yourself and have the courage, the determination, the dedication, the competitive drive and if you are willing to sacrifice the little things in life and pay the price for the things that are worthwhile, it can be done.” Vince Lombardi “Getting ahead in a difficult profession requires avid faith in yourself. That is why some people with mediocre talent, but with great inner drive, go so much further than people with vastly superior talent.” Sophia Loren

Hump Day Thoughts on "Coming to terms - mine, yours, or ours" 05/9/12

Already the 9th of May, and so far it seems like this month is just rolling along. All the signs are present that spring is definitely in the air as I see flowers in full bloom and folks have long since shed their long sleeves. This is probably one of the most exciting times of the year for a lot of families with the flurry of graduations and Mother's Day this upcoming weekend. Twelve years ago I know how exciting it was for me to walk across the stage at Jackson State University the day before Mother's Day. What an exciting time that was for me to make my mother proud and begin new chapters in my life. Looking back over the last twelve years it seems as though I never left school because the learning doesn't stop. Sometimes I wonder about the journey that I have taken over the years only to see where I am growing still learning about the world and myself. I have realized that once you stop learning you have really stopped growing. Through conversations with some people and a little self-discovery I have accepted the fact that I am selfish about some things. At first I was a little taken aback, but then it made sense as I am very hesitant to let go of; things I have worked for, my time, my thoughts/ideas. I guess the common denominator is that those things are mine before anyone else's. This observation took me down a path of in what circumstances do I share these things. At the end of the day, I make the choice to share these things on my terms; when and where I want to. Is there anything that you tend to be selfish about? What are those things? Why do think you do? So I started to develop some of my thoughts on why we tend to be selfish with things and it appears that it all boils down to on whose terms. Confusing at this minute probably. I am probably going to have to dig a little deeper to make the connection between selfish and terms. You may notice how the world works that if the terms are favorable for another party then there really are not any concerns on their behalf. And I guess that's really human nature for people to choose to engage in things where the terms are favorable based on their situation. Why would one ever engage in something where the terms were unfavorable? Have you ever agreed to something on unfavorable terms? Why did you do it? At some point in life we may have to make a decision on whose terms things are going be on. Before we do anything we are given a choice and it is important to figure out how we want to proceed. Whether its a relationship, career, giving of our time, or even a purchase of something there are terms that we are willing to agree to. What happens when the terms are not something you are willing to agree to? What are your next steps? Do you look elsewhere for an opportunity that's on your terms? Or do you just deal with it what you have? Is there an opportunity to negotiate to more favorable terms? You may be in a situation right now having trouble coming to terms with something, but you are going to have to be the one to make the decision whether you will or not. People can present things to us over time, but we still have to decide what we are going to do. Whether they are my terms or your terms, you can't escape coming to terms with anything. It all starts in the mind and you have to remember that positive thoughts breed positive actions. From here on out, remember that the #PositiveMovementsForward lifestyle is the foundation to get you where you want to be. Have you come to terms with that, yet? All the ingredients are present now for you to live life and be amazing, but the question is are you willing to agree to the terms to get you there? “In simplest terms, a leader is one who knows where he wants to go, and gets up, and goes.” John Erksine “Stop thinking in terms of limitations and start thinking in terms of possibilities” Terry Josephson “If you think in terms of a year, plant a seed; if in terms of ten years, plant trees; if in terms of 100 years, teach the people.” Confucius “Those who really seek the path to Enlightenment dictate terms to their mind. Then they proceed with strong determination.” Buddha “The most valuable things in life are not measured in monetary terms. The really important things are not houses and lands, stocks and bonds, automobiles and real state, but friendships, trust, confidence, empathy, mercy, love and faith.” Bertrand Russell “The customer perceives service in his or her own terms” Arch McGill “If you wish to converse with me, define your terms” Voltaire “You are a product of your environment. So choose the environment that will best develop you toward your objective. Analyze your life in terms of its environment. Are the things around you helping you toward success - or are they holding you back?” W. Clement Stone “Anyone who cannot come to terms with his life while he is alive needs one hand to ward off a little his despair over his fate... but with his other hand he can note down what he sees among the ruins.” Franz Kafka “If you haven't the strength to impose your own terms upon life, you must accept the terms it offers you.” T. S. Eliot

Over the Hump Thoughts on "Getting Intimate" 5/3/12

We are three days into the month of May and I can already see that there will be a lot of memories here. There is quite a bit going on in my world which is a mirror of the rest of the world. I know that a lot of people will remember today based simply on some of the news stories that were reported throughout the day. You can't turn a TV on right now without hearing something about the passing of Junior Seau, suspension of the New Orleans Saints players for their bounty program, or justice for Robert Champion(FAMU Drum Major killed during a hazing incident). Some of these events may catch a quick thought from you and you may even have an opinion, but if you don't have an intimate relationship with any of incidents it probably doesn't impact you as much. My thoughts and prayers definitely go out to the families and friends of Junior Seau and Robert Champion with everything that they are dealing with right now. I didn't want to reference these things, but as I am a sports nut Sportscenter and various news channels were flooded with this information I began to have a few thoughts on the brain. The events are sad, but they lend me an opportunity to dive into something that will bring a little more clarity to my life. Define intimacy for yourself. How do things change when you choose to have a intimate relationship with people? Your career? Relationships? God? Anything? Surprisingly, I think when most people see the term intimate they immediately think of men and women being intimate with one another. The term is so much bigger than that as I believe that you can see a direct correlation to how things turn out for you based on your intimacy level with them. Why is it we tend to avoid intimacy with things? Is it that we are we scared? The thoughts that are on my brain right now are pretty heavy and I know that they are probably going t get deeper as things start to unfold. Take a quick moment and think about everything that you have chosen to have an intimate relationship with. What is it that made you desire to be more intimate? Is it a feeling right this moment? Or the promise of something amazing at the end? No matter what is, when you make the decision that you want to become more intimate, there's an immediate change for you in the way you look at things and your expectations from there on. Our intimacy levels with things can be the difference of success or failure in many different areas of our lives. Is there something that you may have wanted over the course of your life, but just could not attain it? Why do you think that is? Did you get intimate in developing your plan to achieve your desired result? As we continue to move forward in life, it is important to decide what we are willing to get intimate with in order to get to the next level. Getting intimate with the right things at the right time may change our lives as well as the lives of those around you. Your attitude is where it all starts and you have to remember that positive thoughts breed positive actions. Living the #PositiveMovementsForward lifestyle is the beginning of where change happens for you. What are you willing to get more intimate with now? “Passion is the quickest to develop, and the quickest to fade. Intimacy develops more slowly, and commitment more gradually still.” Robert Sternberg “Communication leads to community, that is, to understanding, intimacy and mutual valuing.” Rollo May “Most people have come to prefer certain of life’s experiences and deny and reject others, unaware of the value of the hidden things that may come wrapped in plain and even ugly paper. In avoiding all pain and seeking comfort at all costs, we may be left without intimacy or compassion; in rejecting change and risk we often cheat ourselves of the quest; in denying our suffering we may never know our strength or our greatness.” Rachel Naomi Remen “It's the most precious thing...to know absolutely where you belong. There's a whole emotional wrapping-around-of-you-here. You see the same rock, tree, road, clouds, sun – you develop a nice kind of intimacy with the world around you. To be intimate is to grow, to learn... [it] is absolutely fulfilling. Intimacy, that's my magic word for why I live here.” Tessie Naranjo “To mature is in part to realize that while complete intimacy and omniscience and power cannot be had, self-transcendence, growth, and closeness to others are nevertheless within one's reach.” Sissela Bok