Thursday, December 22, 2011

Thursday Morning Thoughts on Maximum Effort 12/22/11

Whew, we made it over the hump and there are just a more days before Christmas will be here. This is probably one of the most exciting weeks of the year as we prepare to enjoy family, friends, and loved ones.

The day isn't even here and I can honestly say that I have almost all that I could ask for this holiday season. My mother arrived safely back in country with two of my favorite little people so they can all spend the holiday with family.(I will be there in spirit) The holidays always make me appreciate how fortunate I am to have so many people all over the world that care about me. Although I haven't been home to spend a holiday with my family since Thanksgiving of 2009, I am always around my adopted/extended family. The older I get, the more I appreciate the simplicity of the holiday season and being around the people that you care about while you can.

Looking at the clock right now I should be sleep, but between the cold I am coming down with and the random thoughts running through my head I'm wide awake. For at least the last couple of days I am thinking that conversations and encounters with others have been steering me to these lingering thoughts that I'm having. It's ironic that just last week I was asking the question "Are you prepared to finish?" And now I am sitting here trying to wrap my mind around the role that effort plays in so many facets our lives.

Coincidentally, before I started organizing my thoughts to figure out the direction I was going in, ESPN's Mike and Mike was talking about effort this morning. One of the examples they gave was with the last 2 weeks of the NFL schedule you have teams that have been eliminated from the playoffs playing teams that are headed to the playoffs. On the surface you have a team that has something to play for and a team that essentially doesn't have anything to play for. Well, that is not 100% true as everyone on the field no matter which team they are on has something to play for. The players on the non-playoff team have just as much to play for as there could be a coaching change and their job status the following year could be even more uncertain. Whether or not there's something on the line right now or in the future, there's reason for all players to give 100% effort.

At this hour, I couldn't have asked for a better example to help me lay out my thoughts about effort. The year will essentially be over in a little over a week and I am sure that we all have goals that we laid out January 1st that we may or may not have met in some form or fashion. Did you meet all your goals? If you didn't, why not? What kind of effort were you giving?

As I pose these questions I think more about my efforts in many areas of my life right now. I am asking myself the questions too, but also giving some additional food for thought about our efforts. In society these days I think there a lot of people who look for the biggest reward with a minimal amount of effort required. Last time I checked effort and reward do not have an inverse relationship.

What is it that motivates you to give your best? Family? Friends? Success?
Fear of failure?

What kind of effort are giving now at this stage of your life? In your family? Career? Relationships with others? Spiritual Life?

What are you willing to give maximum effort for? Why?

I am sure that I haven't scratched the service with the concept of effort, but I hope that I laid a pretty strong foundation about effort. One of the most amazing things about our efforts is that it doesn't stop with us, as we have the checks and balances of the world on our side as people around us witness our efforts. I am so thankful for my friends/loved ones that often provide that needed check of my efforts. And I think because of that, I am more worried about disappointing them than I am letting myself down.

All I can say is no matter what, put your best foot forward as there is always someone watching. The rewards may come when you want them, but your efforts will not go unnoticed. I challenge you to start small by putting maximum effort into living your life and being amazing. I am confident that everything else will fall into place after that.

Happy Holidays to you and yours and wishing you a prosperous New Year!


“God places the heaviest burden on those who can carry its weight.”

-Reggie White

“Every accomplishment starts with the decision to try.”

“Effort only fully releases its reward after a person refuses to quit.”

-Napoleon Hill

“If you can't excel with talent, triumph with effort.”

-Dave Weinbaum

“The worst thing one can do is not to try, to be aware of what one wants and not give in to it, to spend years in silent hurt wondering if something could have materialized - and never knowing”

-David Viscott

“We are responsible for the effort, not the outcome”

“Great effort springs naturally from great attitude.”

-Pat Riley

“Winning is not everything, but the effort to win is.”

-Zig Ziglar

“The real tragedy is the tragedy of the man who never in his life braces himself for his one supreme effort, who never stretches to his full capacity, never stands up to his full stature”

-Arnold Bennett

Monday, December 19, 2011

Rainy Day Thoughts on Finishing 12/13/11

The rain in Phoenix the last couple of days has given me an opportunity to slow down a little to figure some things out. Rain always seems to have a calming effect for me as I remember that just because it rains, the show still goes on. To me its a reminder of continuing to proceed forward, but to be a little more cautious with everything as everyone doesn't handle the rain well.

In less than three weeks this year will be over. Yup, 2011 will officially be in the books and we will be ushering in 2012 ready to do it all over again. I swear as I get older, I think that life continues to speed by at a faster speed than it did yesterday. The more that it speeds up, it seems like the more I enjoy it.

As I look to close out the year I have to look back and reflect on quite a few things. When the clock struck 11:59 pm on December 31, 2010 I was ready for 2011 with a great plan in hand so I thought. Somewhere during the course of the year I knew that there was no way I was finishing the year the way that I started it. Regardless of where I am when I finish it, my goal has always been to follow through to see the end of the year.

Over the last week or so it seems like there has been a common theme surrounding me about closing/finishing so I guess that's where I'll be for the next several moments. Last week friend of mine in sales was saying "I really hate this time of the year as I can't seem to get motivated, but I know what I need to do to finish the year."

What is it about the last couple of months of the year that shift our mindset to where we have to focus extra hard to finish the year strong? I think it might be the looking forward to the new year and a new start. How often are we merely refreshed just thinking about the new year that's coming?

Ask yourself is it harder to start or finish something? I am sure that the debate can go on for quite awhile with differing opinions. Think about it this way, while you are preparing yourself for the start you have gotten everything in order to begin when you are ready. Once you have started, you don't have 100% control over everything but sometimes takes extra focus to stay the course. You've got internal/external factors that could be roadblocks along the way as you try to complete tasks.

It's pretty simple that to start something is easy, but to actually finish it requires a little more. Dedication, focus, heart, and an unwavering will are needed to propel you beyond the start.

Have you ever started something that you didn't finish? Why didn't you finish? Have you ever thought to yourself why would I start something I had no intentions of finishing? Are you honest with yourself when you start something?

How much better can your tomorrow be when you know that you finished today strong. Always ask yourself, "Now that I have started, am I prepared to finish?" As we prepare to get over the Hump, I ask that you live the life that you have imagined and be a finisher.

“We shall neither fail nor falter; we shall not weaken or tire...give us the tools and we will finish the job.”

-Winston Churchill

“We rate ability in men by what they finish, not by what they attempt”

“Finish each day and be done with it. You have done what you could. Some blunders and absurdities no doubt crept in, forget them as soon as you can. Tomorrow is a new day, you shall begin it well and serenely...”

-Ralph Waldo Emerson

“It is the job that is never started that takes longest to finish.”

J.R.R. Tolkien

“When you have a great and difficult task, something perhaps almost impossible, if you only work a little at a time, every day a little, suddenly the work will finish itself.”

-Isak Dinesen

“If I'd had some set idea of a finish line, don't you think I would have crossed it years ago?”

-Bill Gates

“If you spend too much time warming up, you'll miss the race. If you don't warm up at all, you may not finish the race.”

-Grand Heidrich

“There are two golden rules for an orchestra: start together and finish together. The public doesn't give a damn what goes on in between.”

-Sir Thomas Beecham

“All endeavor calls for the ability to tramp the last mile, shape the last plan, endure the last hours toil. The fight to the finish spirit is the one... characteristic we must posses if we are to face the future as finishers.”

-Henry David Thoreau

“No matter how long it takes, If you keep moving, One step at a time, You will reach the finish line...”

Sunday, December 4, 2011

Saturday Morning Thoughts on Respect 12/3/11

Looks like we have made it to another weekend, but I can honestly say that it wasn't the easiest of weeks for me. I haven't been able to sleep longer than four hours the last couple of nights for one reason or another. When I am in situations like these I know why I can't sleep and its probably because my mind is in overdrive replaying things in my head that I have been in the midst of recently.

I don't normally let a lot of stuff bother me, but I almost lost my cool several times this week. Ever since I was a young whipper snapper, I have always had been thrown off when people don't treat me with respect. For some strange reason I have always felt like that is really the only thing I am owed in this world is respect. Sadly enough we really don't get an opportunity to be around people that have respect these days. My mother says it best that if I had been alive during the Civil Rights days, I wouldn't have lived to tell about it. And I could never argue with her as she was always right about that one.

Most people would immediately think that my issues would revolve around visible differences, but that is not even the case. For me it is so much deeper as I think about respect. On so many levels respect is just absent from a lot of things in the world today. I have learned that people like different things, so respect their likes and dislikes. People think differently, so respect their opinion. Everyone doesn't see everything the same way, so respect their perspective. I could go on and on, but I am sure you can see the picture that I am trying to paint.

How different would the world be if people knew what respect was? It seems as though respect has gone by the wayside these days based on what we see in our daily lives. Companies have lost respect for employees as they view them simply as just a number these days. Companies are forgetting why they are in business as employees don't show respect for their customers. And as I look at these examples, it really isn't the company itself, but the people. Respect starts with an individual and lack there of can trickle down to the employees and ultimately to the customer. How surprising it is to see people forget that without the customers, there is no job for them.

Take a moment and think about your personal and professional life. Do you give the necessary respect to others? Are you respected as a man/woman? Are you respected because of a position? Or are you respected as a human being? What do you respect? Why? How do you lose respect?

I honestly believe that there are a lot of people in this world that struggle with this because the never saw what respect was in their home growing up. I think that is one of our biggest problems in society right now. Respect starts at home and if you have that piece it will carry you far in life. At least that's my two cents, whether you like it or not you can respect that I have an opinion.

As you look to enjoy your weekend, go out and do something memorable. Enjoy the moments and never second guess yourself as opportunities are not always going to be the same. Live life and be amazing as only you know what that life looks like.

“I'm not concerned with your liking or disliking me... All I ask is that you respect me as a human being.”

-Jackie Robinson

“In the end we are all separate: our stories, no matter how similar, come to a fork and diverge. We are drawn to each other because of our similarities, but it is our differences we must learn to respect.”

“Men are respectable only as they respect”

-Ralph Waldo Emerson

“Treat others as you want them to treat you because what goes around comes around”

“Only those who respect the personality of others can be of real use to them”

-Albert Schweitzer

“This is the final test of a gentleman: his respect for those who can be of no possible service to him”

-William Lyon Phelps

“Respect your efforts, respect yourself. Self-respect leads to self-discipline. When you have both firmly under your belt, that's real power.”

-Clint Eastwood

Monday Morning Thoughts on Real/Truth 11/28/11

The Thanksgiving holiday has come and gone so I can honestly say that I was reminded of how much that I have to be thankful for. I really don't think I needed the holiday in order to arrive at that conclusion, but it really didn't hurt either. If you know me, you probably already have an idea that I may have a little something on the brain based on something that I may have heard/ seen over the last several days.

I was leaving the job this evening a young man I work with paid me the ultimate compliment telling me that he appreciated me cause I was real. I can honestly say, I know why he would say that because there aren't a lot of REAL people where we work. Which really isn't too much different than the overall world we live in. So I guess it is a pretty accurate reflection of society these days.

So it is to no one's surprise that my thoughts have started to revolve around Real and Truth. The two are really related and it seems so simple but a lot of people just don't know what it means. Lately, I have been having a lot of discussions with my inner self as I continue to maneuver through life. I have reached down deep inside and began to discover a lot more about myself that is ultimately helping me in more ways than I could have ever imagined. I can feel that I am on the cusp of something amazing and after I finish getting all these words off my chest who knows what's next.

Have you ever wondered what the biggest obstacle is for you in life? In my mind it is pretty simple and affects so many other aspects of your life. If we were honest and real with ourselves it would be quite the shock to see how things change begin to change for us.

Think about receiving constructive criticism from someone who obviously knows that you have the potential to do better. They are hard on you often times because you haven't been hard enough on yourself to get the best results.

Think about some of the relationships that you have with people and it seems like the people can't or won't keep it real. It has nothing to do with you, but more to do with them. Those people have trouble being honest with themselves so how could we even expect them to be honest with us.

What is your definition of real? Is your truth what you know, or what you see? Are you being honest with yourself about why you are at your current position in life? Why is it that we avoid the truth? Are we afraid of the truth? Or are we afraid that we may have to change?

I leave you with these questions that I have also asked myself over and over. As you go into this new week and prepare to usher in a new month, I say go forward with a smile on your face! Live life and be amazing as you only get one shot at this thing called life. At the end of the day, be true to yourself and everything will work out as it is supposed to.

“All truths are easy to understand once they are discovered; the point is to discover them.”

-Galileo Galilei

“Unless your heart, your soul, and your whole being are behind every decision you make, the words from your mouth will be empty, and each action will be meaningless. Truth and confidence are the roots of happiness.”

“You never find yourself until you face the truth”

-Pearl Bailey

“The truth is incontrovertible, malice may attack it, ignorance may deride it, but in the end; there it is.”

-Winston Churchill

“What you perceive, your observations, feelings, interpretations, are all your truth. Your truth is important. Yet it is not The Truth.”

-Linda Ellinor

“The truth is not for all men, but only for those who seek it.”

-Ayn Rand

“Risk! Risk anything! Care no more for the opinions of others, for those voices. Do the hardest thing on earth for you. Act for yourself. Face the truth.”

-Katherine Mansfield

“If you look for truth, you may find comfort in the end; if you look for comfort you will not get either comfort or truth only soft soap and wishful thinking to begin, and in the end, despair.”

-C.S. Lewis

Thursday Night Thoughts on Choosing the Right Attitude 10/13/11

If I was any other place in the world I would be enjoying a relaxing fall afternoon, but that is not the case as I feel the 95 degrees here in the Valley of the Sun. I guess that life could be worse, but I am still going to embrace it as I know some people are freezing somewhere. Just like that I had a choice and I decided to embrace all the positives that I could see about the weather in an effort to move forward with my day.

I am not really sure why the last couple of mornings when I woke up I was feeling a certain kind of way. I am thinking that it may have something to do with me finally developing a comfort level with a lot of decisions that I have made recently. I try not to be one of those people that 2nd guesses their choices because I think I have enough life experience to make good sound reasonable decisions. Basic human nature makes us feel this way at times even about the simplest decisions.

At any point during the day we are faced with choices from what to wear, what to eat, and what kind of attitude to have. Choosing the right attitude is probably one of the most important decisions that we make on a daily basis. It seems simple enough, but often times not choosing to have the right attitude just may make life harder.

When you wake up daily what is your attitude toward life? Are you embracing the opportunities in front of you? Or are you dreading heading to work or starting your day?

What is your attitude toward others? Are you building others up? Or are you choosing to just look out for you?

Just a simple example that most of us deal with daily, but choosing to have the right attitude at the start of the day has a tremendous impact on those around you.

As you move closer to enjoying the weekend, think about choices you make about your attitude towards many different things in life. Your attitude is contagious and can be the thing that carries you through the tough times. Choose to have a smile on your face, a positive outlook on life, and the right attitude with everything you do. Trust me it isn't always easy, but it's definitely worth it in the long run. Live life and be amazing in whatever you do.
“If the ladder is not leaning against the right wall, every step we take just gets us to the wrong place faster”

-Stephen Covey

“There are always two choices. Two paths to take. One is easy. And its only reward is that it's easy.”

“If you limit your choices only to what seems possible or reasonable, you disconnect yourself from what you truly want, and all that is left is compromise.”

-Robert Fritz

“To live is to choose. But to choose well, you must know who you are and what you stand for, where you want to go and why you want to get there.”

-Kofi Annan

“Choose a subject equal to your abilities; think carefully what your shoulders may refuse, and what they are capable of bearing.”

-Horace

"When personal judgment is inoperative (or forbidden), men's first concern is not how to choose, but how to justify their choice”

-Ayn Rand

“Life is not a continuum of pleasant choices, but of inevitable problems that call for strength, determination, and hard work”

-Indian Proverb

“I believe that we are solely responsible for our choices, and we have to accept the consequences of every deed, word, and thought throughout our lifetime.”

-Elizabeth Kubler-Ross

“As human beings, we are endowed with freedom of choice, and we cannot shuffle off our responsibility upon the shoulders of God or nature. We must shoulder it ourselves. It is our responsibility.”

-Arnold Toynbee

“The strongest principle of growth lies in the human choice.”

-George Eliot

Sunday Afternoon Reflections on Making Adjustments 8/28/11

Seems like another weekend has flown by and I wonder where the time went. In the midst of relaxing, staying out of the heat, and keeping tabs on what Hurricane Irene was doing, I can say that it was a pretty uneventful weekend. It never fails that when my mind is idle that I tend to have a lingering thought about something going on in my day to day life.

I think I am in a pretty good place when I get to observe my friends and take part in discussions about life and the world. It seems like no matter what I was talking about this week, things always seem to revolve around the same ole same ole. Not just saying that we talk about the same ole thing all the time, but just hearing/seeing the same things over and over. I can honestly say that my eyes lit up on this topic as I thought about the definition of insanity – “Doing the same thing over and over expecting a different result.”

Seems like recently I have heard everything from I am just tired of when people do this and do that or why do I keep attracting a certain kind of person in my life. I have found that I tend to sit back and listen to see when there is going to be a comment that someone made an adjustment or change, but it never comes.

The more that I live I learn that most people don’t really make adjustments in situations until they are forced to. I sometimes wonder if it is merely that people are afraid of leaving their comfort zone or something else that I just haven’t put my finger on just yet. How many times have you known someone who complained about a job they were working? At the same time, how many of those same people were doing something to put them in a position to be in a different job? Or what about this classic example that I am sure we all have heard from time to time from some people that aren’t in a serious relationship, “I don’t know why but I can’t seem to meet the right person.”

I have learned that no matter what the situation is in life be it related to your career or just your personal relationships you have to sit down and assess it all. If we are willing to do an honest assessment of our situations to figure out what needs to be adjusted in order to achieve different results. In our every day lives adjustments are made when we are forced to make them, but what is stopping us from being proactive? I believe that most people are reactive by nature, based on how and when we make adjustments.

What kind of adjustments have you had to make in life? Career? Relationships? Family? What has prevented you from making adjustments? Do you find that the adjustments you have made are of a proactive or reactive nature? How are you influenced to make adjustments?

I think about what my answers to these questions are, and realize that it all boils down to what I am willing to do in order to realize a different result. I hope that you are able to make the adjustments necessary in order to get to where you desire to be in every aspect of your life. Sometimes adjustments aren’t necessarily what we want, but what we need to get to the next level.

Let’s make it a great start to the week as your prepare to Live Life and Be Amazing!

“I can't change the direction of the wind, but I can adjust my sails to always reach my destination.”

-Jimmy Dean

“There are things I can't force. I must adjust. There are times when the greatest change needed is a change of my viewpoint.”

-Denis Diderot

“When it is obvious that the goals cannot be reached, don't adjust the goals, adjust the action steps.”

-Confucius

“Learn to adjust yourself to the conditions you have to endure, but make a point of trying to alter or correct conditions so that they are most favorable to you.”

-William Frederick Book

“Life is the continuous adjustment of internal relations to external relations”

-Herbert Spencer

“Happiness comes from... some curious adjustment to life.”

-Hugh Walpole

Saturday Afternoon Thoughts on Values 8/13/11

Another scorcher in the valley, but it appears to be partly sunny and only 100 degrees. I am sitting here relaxing a little bit on a Saturday afternoon and contemplating what might be next. It is kind of funny that even when I am resting, I can’t relax my mind enough to stop thinking. Maybe that’s a good thing as some of my best thoughts have come when I have been in chill mode.

It should be no surprise that I have been thinking a little hard about some things after some conversations with friends and family the last couple of days. I guess I should give a little more background on the foundation of the conversations that have me thinking a little deeper right now.

1. A high school in Alabama spent over $1 million dollars on their football program over the last 3 years.
2. A female friend of mine said a couple of things that stood out to me this week, “I’ve decided some guys are just thoughtful and sweet and want to treat the woman in their life like a lady and some are not! It’s like they either have it or don’t and it doesn’t seem teachable” and “I love when older men tip their hat at you when you walk by them. Such a simple and nice gesture. I wish people were still like that”

I felt it was important to see how simple the commentary was that lead me down a path of enlightenment. Just looking at these two examples, you probably wouldn’t be able to connect the two things that spurred my additional thoughts. Even though the two things don’t seem related they are very connected as they both will make you start thinking more about values.

No secret that we all have different values about a wide range of things, but it is also interesting how we allow society to define our values for us. I bring this up as I look at the fact that a high school athletic program will spend $1 million dollars on an athletic program while teachers are still quite underpaid. Now, these same teachers are responsible for encouraging, teaching, and molding our future leaders. What does this say about the value of education? Yet another example that society is telling us what we are willing to place a premium on, and we buy into it by filling up the stands and watching the games.

In the 2nd example, I get to revisit something that never ceases to be a topic of conversation lately. In terms of relationships with men and women, it is very clear to see that there are people out here that have different value systems. Both men and women have to make choices about their values and whether or not they are willing to compromise in anyway. If you value you respect, it doesn’t make sense to be around people that don’t show you respect. When we make decisions and compromise our values, we aren’t being honest with ourselves about who we are and what we want.

What values are important to you? What do you value? Are values different based on gender? Are values different in regions of the country? What does society value? Have you ever compromised your values? Have you ever had to restore your values?

At the end of the day, our values have shaped us to be who we are as well as fostered traditions in our families and communities. A core of strong values will take you far in life and we have to do a better job of teaching others through an example not just through words. There’s someone watching you right now and drawn to you because your values are similar or they admire your walk in life.

As you enjoy the rest of our weekend, I challenge you to take the positive you have in you and share with the rest of the world. Live life and be amazing!


“Until you value yourself, you won't value your time. Until you value your time, you will not do anything with it.”

-M. Scott Peck

“Only the man who crosses the river at night knows the value of the light of day”

-Chinese Proverb

“The value of compassion cannot be over-emphasized. Anyone can criticize. It takes a true believer to be compassionate. No greater burden can be borne by an individual than to know no one cares or understands.”

-Arthur Stainback

“Values provide perspective in the best of times and the worst”

-Charles Garfield

“We do not know the true value of our moments until they have undergone the test of memory.”

-Georges Duhamel

“Our society's values are being corrupted by advertising's insistence on the equation: Youth equals popularity, popularity equals success, success equals happiness.”

-John Arbuthnot Fisher

“Look inside yourself and you'll find a world of things (a world of your own experiences) worth writing about.”

-Bette Greene

“Your true value depends entirely on what you are compared with.”

-Bob Wells

Friday Afternoon Thoughts on Moments 8/5/11

Looks like another blazing week in the Valley of the Sun with temperatures stuck in triple digits. I'm Trying to relax and stay cool on this Friday afternoon, reflecting on my interactions and things I have witnessed lately. The more I live, the more I start to focus on the things that people do versus what they say.

Lately, I have been engaged in a lot of discussions about life and relationships. There are many moments that make up our lives, and some of them begin to define our lives and relationships with people.

No matter what goes on in our lives we are faced with choices every day that we are here. In the moment of making decisions we are often relying on our past experiences or stepping out on faith in order to move forward. It is in that moment that we learn to trust our experiences and our instincts to impact our future.

I'm pretty sure that we can all go back and find a moment in a relationship and determine when we decided the kind of relationship it would be. I have some friends that knew the moment the first met someone that they would end up marrying them. I think that may have been a pretty powerful moment to have vision of a future with another person.

These thoughts about moments have also taken me to think about moments that we made decisions about taking things to the next level. And by next level I mean in our relationships and in our lives. What was it that had you going from good to great and from great to amazing?

Have you had any defining moments in relationships? Did they strengthen the relationship? Or weaken the relationship? Have you had a moment that made you want to be better? Better person? Better friend? Better companion? Better leader/role model? What can those around you say about you this moment?

At the same time that I ask these questions of myself, I can also ask what am I doing with this moment? Are we doing the right things in this moment so that we are looking forward to the next moment?

Regardless of what is going on in our lives, we should cherish this moment as we will never get it back. As you prepare to enjoy this weekend, appreciate where you are and enjoy the people in your life. The moment that you have tomorrow may be different, but the fact that you can enjoy it is the opportunity you must take advantage of.

Live life and be amazing!

“Any so-called material thing that you want is merely a symbol: you want it not for itself, but because it will content your spirit for the moment.”

-Mark Twain

“Breathe. Let go. And remind yourself that this very moment is the only one you know you have for sure.”

-Oprah Winfrey

“I'd rather have a moment of wonderful than a lifetime of nothing special.”

“The secret of health for both mind and body is not to mourn for the past, worry about the future, or anticipate troubles, but to live in the present moment wisely and earnestly.”

-Buddha

“What you need to know about the past is that no matter what has happened, it has all worked together to bring you to this very moment. And this is the moment you can choose to make everything new. Right now.”

“You can't let one bad moment spoil a bunch of good ones.”

-Dale Earnhardt

“You must live in the present, launch yourself on every wave, find your eternity in each moment.”

-Henry David Thoreau

“The friend who can be silent with us in a moment of despair or confusion, who can stay with us in an hour of grief and bereavement, who can tolerate not knowing... not healing, not curing... that is a friend who cares.”

-Henri Nouwen

“Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another, 'What! You too? I thought I was the only one”

-C.S. Lewis

Reflections After Mother's Day 2011 5/10/11

Mother's Day weekend usually coincides with college graduations and family gatherings as mothers have the ability to bring people in from near and far. For me it has been a pretty decent weekend as I was able to enjoy some time with friends and extended family. Golf, good food, good times, and ice cold beverages was exactly the prescription needed for a relaxing weekend.

I had a few thoughts on the brain as I think about the impact that women have had on the world raising their children and taking care of their families. I don't know where I would be if I didn't have the love and support of my mother, surrogate mothers, and other motherly figures that have made an impact on me over the years.

As we look at our lives what it is it about the mother figures lives that contribute to our successes? Is it the nurturing component? Is it the desire to see the smile on their face knowing that they approve of your actions?

There's just something about a mother's love that makes you feel unlike anything else. No matter where we are in life or what we do, we will always believe that a mother's love will be there with us always in spite of. What have we learned from the mother figures in our lives that lead us to believe this? As, I started to answer this question I started to think about why we believe the things that we do.

There are so many statements or sayings that we have heard over time about believing; 'Seeing is believing,' 'Believe none of what you hear and everything that you see' etc. As I think about the role of mother's in our lives, they have shown us from the very beginning that their love is unprecedented through their words and actions toward us.

So as we think about what we believe, we should overlay what we have learned from our mother's as we move forward in our lives. I trust that this week is starting amazing for you and that you welcome the many blessings heading your way.

“Run your fingers through my soul. For once, just once, feel exactly what I feel, believe what I believe, perceive as I perceive, look, experience, examine, and for once; just once, understand.”

“In the sky, there is no distinction of east and west; people create distinctions out of their own minds and then believe them to be true.”

-Buddha

“When someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time.”

-Oprah Winfrey

“Believe and act as if it were impossible to fail.”

-Charles Kettering

“Success means having the courage, the determination, and the will to become the person you believe you were meant to be”

-George Sheehan

“Believe in your dreams and they may come true; believe in yourself and they will come true”

“Believe it can be done. When you believe something can be done, really believe, your mind will find the ways to do it. Believing a solution paves the way to solution.”

-David Joseph Schwartz

“Love what you do. Believe in your instincts. And you'd better be able to pick yourself up and brush yourself off every day.”

“One comes to believe whatever one repeats to oneself sufficiently often, whether the statement be true of false. It comes to be dominating thought in one's mind.”

-Robert Collier

Tuesday Evening Thoughts after Good Friday 4/26/11

The Friday before Easter will always be Good Friday, but for some reason this particular Friday was a little more than good. The weather seemed to cooperate a little bit and it wasn't that unbearable as the high was only 89 when we anticipated mid 90's. Anytime that happens, my days easily go from good to great and sometimes amazing.

Just about third of the year is passed and all I can say where did the time go. The year has moved relatively fast and I can't say that I haven't enjoyed the ride. There are so many things going on in my life right that are

As I look at my life, my family, and circle of friends I see a lot situations where there is some sort of farewell or new beginning that is taking place. Recently lost another member of the family, but they lived a very full life. I do know that we will see them again and their memory will always be with us. I also have seen a lot of people within my circle move on to new opportunities in new places allowing for a new start.

I am learning now that sometimes its necessary to say farewell in some situations in order to grow. Through the many stages of our lives we may have to say farewell to things that we may have been comfortable with. We learn to live without people and things, but our living doesn't stop there. We can learn to create new legacies, new traditions, and new ways to get by.

Sometimes closing a chapter in our lives leads to a new chapter and maybe even a new book. There was a time that we all had to say good bye to our training wheels, favorite toy, or even our favorite blanket like Linus. There are times we need to let go of our security blankets and step out of our comfort zones in order to grow into our next season.

What was the toughest thing you ever had to part with? What were things like after? Were you stronger? What was the hardest thing you ever had to begin? What is imperative to have while laying a foundation for a new beginning?

As you move forward this week, embrace the opportunities before you that are preparing you to be amazing. Embrace the doors that may have closed for you as there is always another for you to open in order to walk over the next new threshold waiting for you. Don't be afraid to close any door that may need to be closed in order to move forward and the same holds true for opening doors.

“Don't be dismayed at goodbyes, a farewell is necessary before you can meet again and meeting again, after moments or lifetimes, is certain for those who are friends.”

-Richard Bach

“Here's to the bright New Year, and a fond farewell to the old; here's to the things that are yet to come, and to the memories that we hold.”

“Man's feelings are always purest and most glowing in the hour of meeting and of farewell”

-Jean Paul Richter

“If you have made mistakes, there is always another chance for you. You may have a fresh start any moment you choose, for this thing we call 'failure' is not the falling down, but the staying down.”

-Mary Pickford

“The first step towards getting somewhere is to decide that you are not going to stay where you are.”

“He who chooses the beginning of the road chooses the place it leads to. It is the means that determines the end.”

-Harry Emerson Fosdick

“The beginning is the most important part of the work.”

-Plato

“So many fail because they don't get started - they don't go. They don't overcome inertia. They don't begin.”

-W. Clement Stone

“What we call the beginning is often the end. And to make an end is to make a beginning. The end is where we start from.”

-T. S. Eliot

Friday Afternoon Thoughts on Decisions 4/1/11

Another Friday afternoon has come upon us and I am trying to enjoy it the best way I know how. I woke up this morning feeling a little relieved as I think I have finally started to get a lot off my chest. A quarter of the year has gone by and I am starting to believe that the year 2011 will be one of the defining years of my life.

The temperature is starting to heat up in the Valley of the Sun as the projected high is 98 degrees today. As I look at the thermometer of my life it seems to correspond well with the temperatures outside. There's been quite a lot on my mind for awhile and I think I have finally prepared myself to appropriately address my thoughts.

There is a lot of uncertainty in our lives from time to time, but that will never stop us from making decisions. Decisions are a part of life and they are necessary for everything from breakfast choices to retirement investment options.

The decisions that we make today will ultimately shape our tomorrow. We can't allow our past decisions to hinder us from making new decisions. With every new experience that comes from making a decision, there should be some growth for us.

What are some of the toughest decisions you have ever needed to make? What makes a decision tough? Is it harder to make a decision when it affects more than just you? Are there any decisions that you are reluctant to make? Why?

As you move forward in anything you do trust that you have knowledge, resources, and people around you to help you make good decisions. Move confidently into your weekend and prepare for more amazing things headed your way.

“The doors we open and close each day decide the lives we live.”

-Flora Whittemore

“Stay committed to your decisions, but stay flexible in your approach.”

-Tom Robbins

“Sometimes it's the smallest decisions that can change your life forever.”

-Keri Russell

“It's not hard to make decisions when you know what your values are.”

“A wise man makes his own decisions, an ignorant man follows public opinion”
-Chinese Proverb

“The most difficult thing is the decision to act, the rest is merely tenacity. The fears are paper tigers. You can do anything you decide to do. You can act to change and control your life; and the procedure , the process is its own reward.”

-Amelia Earhart

“We can try to avoid making choices by doing nothing, but even that is a decision.”

-Gary Collins

“Don't you ever wonder maybe if you took a left turn instead of a right you could be someone different?”

“My basic principle is that you don't make decisions because they are easy; you don't make them because they are cheap; you don't make them because they're popular; you make them because they're right.”

-Theodore Hesburgh

Thursday Afternoon Thoughts - When Love and Passion are in the Right Place 2/17/11

Taking a quick moment out of the day to sit down and reflect on a few things. It should come as no surprise that my current thoughts happen to revolve around love and anything else that could be associated with the Valentine's holiday. Throughout this past weekend and especially on Monday, there was no escaping the holiday and the individuals that were either all for it or against it. Believe it or not, there are some people out here that do not like Valentine's Day one bit.

At first glance, you might see the holiday and focus on the love aspect in terms of a relationship only. What if we just pulled the word "LOVE" out for a moment and just started to pose a few questions that may get you to thinking.

What is love? What does it mean to love? What is it that you love? How do you show love? Do you love yourself?

My thoughts are all over the place right now after reading over those questions again. Like most things in life it all starts internally with us. We are always at the center of anything we do, but we often times fail to remember that it all starts with us. Love is a part of so many things that we do, but are we recognizing its presence in certain areas.

Take a quick moment and just think about your career or the job that you are currently involved in. Do you love what you do? Do you love where you are at? Depending on how you answer the questions, you may need to take a deeper look inside to determine if you are loving everything about yourself this moment.

Think about a food that you love to eat. How do you feel when the food is mentioned? Or how you feel when you are preparing it or sitting down to eat it? I am sure you may be having some problems describing the feeling, but I can bet that there's a smile on your face as you think about it more.

The more I think about it love has a power beyond anything ever imagined and affects not only relationships but careers, preferences, activities, and so many other things. When we have love for something no matter what it is we are willing to put are all into it to the very end. When the love is not there do we put our best foot forward?

In every aspect of your life, how different would things be when love and passion are in the right place at the right time. I think I have arrived at the place that my thoughts trying to get me to. When love and passion are in the right place things become clear.

So at the end of the day, if you can't love yourself how can you love anyone or anything else. Make it a point to love yourself and in turn that love will be shared with others as well as seen in everything that you touch. It's really no secret that if love and passion are in the right place that you are definitely on the road to amazing.

As you prepare to usher in another weekend, I hope that you are ready to embrace some amazing things that are in store for you. Love the moment and seize the opportunity to better prepared for the next amazing moment in your life.

“Love is just a word until someone comes along and gives it meaning.”

“A great leader's courage to fulfill his vision comes from passion, not position.”

-John Maxwell

“We say we love flowers, yet we pluck them. We say we love trees, yet we cut them down. And people still wonder why some are afraid when told they are loved.”

“The way you get meaning into your life is to devote yourself to loving others, devote yourself to your community around you, and devote yourself to creating something that gives you purpose and meaning.”

-Mitch Albom

“Eventually you will come to understand that love heals everything, and love is all there is.”

-Gary Zukav

“Above all, be true to yourself, and if you cannot put your heart in it, take yourself out of it.”

“The beginning of love is to let those we love be perfectly themselves, and not to twist them to fit our own image. Otherwise we love only the reflection of ourselves we find in them.”

-Thomas Merton

“Nothing great in the world has ever been accomplished without passion.”

-Hebbel

“Love is of all passions the strongest, for it attacks simultaneously the head, the heart and the senses.”

-Lao Tzu

Monday Evening Thoughts on When Design Meets Desire 2/7/11

The weekend is over and I am sure that people are still talking about the Super Bowl. There were the events that surrounded the game as well as the commercials that people couldn't wait to see this year. Super Bowl weekend also represents a time for family/friends to get together to enjoy good times and good food. As we marvel at the activities of Super Bowl weekend, I wonder how often we think about what took place prior to the game. We can probably account for the regular season and the playoff games that made it possible for the Pittsburgh Steelers and Green Bay Packers to meet for NFL Championship, but there's much more to it.

As I sat there watching the pre-game specials and then the game there were two words that remained stuck in my head; desire and design. I was trying to enjoy Super Bowl Sunday, but for some reason my intellectual side was itching to put some thoughts on paper. I sat there thinking about desire and design wondering why were these words popping into my head at this time. All of a sudden it started to make sense as I thought about the roads that the Packers and Steelers took that landed them in the Super Bowl.

Yesterday, we could all see the end result of a season of accomplishment and perseverance as the Packers proved successful in winning the Super Bowl. What didn't you see? You didn't see the memories of NFL Draft Day when Aaron Rodgers sat patiently waiting to be drafted before the first round was over. You didn't see the fifteen players from the Packers that were on injured reserve and didn't play in the Super Bowl.

If you take a step back for a moment, you can probably see it in this glaring example from the Super Bowl when design and desire meet. How is it that the Green Bay Packers can draft a quarterback to replace one of the greatest quarterbacks in history? It was by design I can only say as someone saw something in this young man. It was probably his desire to be the best and his desire to make those around him better.

So let's take a look at our own lives for a minute. Have you ever thought about how connected design and desire are? Can we have one without the other and truly be successful? What do you see as your life's design? What is it that you truly desire? Are you ready for design and desire to meet?

Personally, I think I have reached a point where the design of my life and the desires of my heart are just about ready to collide. When you can recognize a moment like this, you have made the statement that I am ready to embrace amazing.

As you prepare to make this an amazing week, try to enjoy each and every moment that you can as there are some things you just can't get back. Be blessed and ready to receive amazing.

“The size of your success is measured by the strength of your desire; the size of your dream; and how you handle disappointment along the way.”

-Robert Kiyosaki

“Good design is a lot like clear thinking made visual.”

-Edward Tufte

“Burning desire to be or do something gives us staying power - a reason to get up every morning or to pick ourselves up and start in again after a disappointment”

-Marsha Sinetar

“Design is intelligence made visible.”

-Alina Wheeler

“Our destiny changes with our thought; we shall become what we wish to become, do what we wish to do, when our habitual thought corresponds with our desire.”

-Orison Swett Marden

“Design is about making things good (and then better) and right (and fantastic) for the people who use and encounter them.”

-Matt Beale

“The desire of knowledge, like the thirst for riches, increases ever with the acquisition of it.”

-Laurence Sterne

“Design creates culture. Culture shapes values. Values determine the future."

-Robert L. Peters

Dreary Monday Afternoon Thoughts 1/31/11

Just a little over 2 weeks removed from the Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. weekend and holiday I find myself with a very heavy heart in addition to a lot of conflicting thoughts. Dr. King had a dream and I often wonder am I moving forward in the manner that he would have wanted me to. There are many people that came before me that paved the way for me to even be able to do some of things that I am doing now.

January is an important month for several different reasons in my opinion: the start of a new year, my birthday month, the MLK holiday and National Mentoring Month. I have to reference National Mentoring Month and the MLK holiday in the same sentence as I can sit back and see that they will forever be intertwined. Dr. King was a very influential man and his dreams/teachings still live on today through the many people that he was a mentor to while he was here.

As I think about starting a new year and setting goals I have to wonder how many of us are having conversations with our mentors as we move forward with in the year. Often times, I feel that we have mentoring relationships on many different levels that we fail to recognize. So as I think about this I wonder where I would be without a lot of the people that have influenced me throughout my life. I do feel as though sometimes I have taken for granted a lot of the interactions and life lessons, but I am often reminded of them in some form or fashion.

Most times I think we take for granted things we are able to see through the people we have in our lives. Mentoring is always happening around us in the form of not only what we hear, but what we see as well.

We have to do a better job of recognizing the situations and people that have been placed in our lives to as yet another opportunity to teach us. No matter how far you go in life there is always something for you to learn.

As I sit here on this dreary cold Monday afternoon thinking about Dr. King's dream and the people that have mentored me: I wonder if I am ready to answer my calling in life?

I think at some point we all reach that point where we ask ourselves some of these questions. Am I ready to answer my calling in life? If not, what is it that is stopping me? Have I already answered my calling? What is it that I am being called to do?

I pose those questions to myself as well as I don't want to take my experiences and relationships for granted as I know they are part of the foundation to prepare me for what I am being called to do. As you prepare to start your week and make it amazing for yourself and those around you I can only ask that you put a smile on your face while you are doing it!



“When it comes to life the critical thing is whether you take things for granted or take them with gratitude.”

-G. K. Chesterton

“Most human beings have an absolute and infinite capacity for taking things for granted”

-Aldous Huxley

“One very important aspect of motivation is the willingness to stop and to look at things that no one else has bothered to look at. This simple process of focusing on things that are normally taken for granted is a powerful source of creativity...”

-Edward de Bono

“Life is a gift. Never take it for granted.”

-Sasha Azevedo

“I keep my friends as misers do their treasure, because of all things granted us by wisdom, none is greater or better than friendship”

“To educate yourself for the feeling of gratitude means to take nothing for granted, but to always seek out and value the kindness that sands behind the action. Nothing that is done for you is a matter of course. Everything originates in a will for the good, which is directed at you. Train yourself never to put off thee word or action for the expression of gratitude.”

-Albert Schweitzer

“The unselfish effort to bring cheer to others will be the beginning of a happier life for ourselves.”

-Helen Keller

“I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.”

-Maya Angelou

Thursday, May 12, 2011

Hump Day Thoughts on New 1/5/11

For most people this is just another Wednesday or the 1st Hump Day of the New Year, but I guess you can say it has another meaning for me. Today is also my 33rd birthday and I can say that only a couple of hours into it I can see that it’s going to be an amazing day. And if you know me at all, you can believe that I am relaxing and enjoying myself with my feet kicked up. The calls and texts that I have received so far have been the perfect gifts that I needed today.(oh and the gift card my brother got me was pretty amazing too) Looking back as a kid growing up I always thought it would take forever to be a certain age, but it seems like the years keep coming faster.

My thirty three years have blessed me with a lot and I am oh so very thankful for my friends, family, and the experiences that have molded me to be the person that I am today. Just when I thought I had 32 figured out, I get to learn about what it means to be 33. That’s probably a normal feeling for most of us, as we leave the old and usher in something new.

A new year has started and set the stage for new opportunities, new changes, new everything, and basically a new you if you take that path. The past is what it is THE PAST, but we can use the experiences, relationships, and people from our past to carry us through the present and to the future.

Some people have this thought that when the New Year hits it means New Year’s resolutions and a new you. And don’t get me wrong it’s not a bad thing as it helps people establish goals and timelines to accomplish things. Often times when we think about something new about ourselves, we tend to think that we have to change something about ourselves. The change we make doesn’t always have to be a big deal, but a simple change of perspective that could bring about a new outlook or even a new view of ourselves. As I mention perspective I have to think about how often we hear others talk about changes that we need to make, but I wonder if they ever thought about changing their perspective on what they see.

So as I prepare to go further into 2011 as a thirty-three year old young man, I asked myself a few questions that may assist with my matriculation into this New Year of my life. I also had to remind myself of the definition of insanity: “DOING THE SAME THING OVER AND OVER EXPECTING A DIFFERENT RESULT!” Remember that in this New Year there are some amazing things on the horizon for you and you just have to be ready for them.

What does new mean to me? What do I have that is old? What am I willing to do in order to see something new? Am I even ready for anything new? People? Relationships? Opportunity? Is my past preventing me from embracing anything new?

“The ideals which have lighted my way, and time after time have given me new courage to face life cheerfully have been kindness, beauty, and truth”

Albert Einstein

“What you need to know about the past is that no matter what has happened, it has all worked together to bring you to this very moment. And this is the moment you can choose to make everything new. Right now.”

“All of the top achievers I know are life-long learners... Looking for new skills, insights, and ideas. If they're not learning, they're not growing... not moving toward excellence.”

-Denis Waitley

“Old ways will always remain unless some one invents a new way and then lives and dies for it”

-Elbert Hubbard

“Nobody can go back and start a new beginning, but anyone can start today and make a new ending.”

-Maria Robinson

“You are never too old to set another goal or to dream a new dream.”

-C.S. Lewis

“Finish each day and be done with it. You have done what you could. Some blunders and absurdities no doubt crept in, forget them as soon as you can. Tomorrow is a new day, you shall begin it well and serenely...”

-Ralph Waldo Emerson

“There are things that we never want to let go of, people we never want to leave behind. But keep in mind that letting go isn’t the end of the world, it’s the beginning of a new life.”

Christmas Thoughts on gifts 12/25/10

There’s no escaping it, Christmas is here and I can only scratch my head as I look at how fast that this year has gone by. For me there was no waking up to the pitter pat of little feet rushing about the house to the Christmas, but that doesn’t mean that so far this Christmas hasn’t been amazing. While, we all have unique experiences I think I love my life so much as I am always able to experience so much Christmas love from all over the world.

I am not sure what time I went to sleep last night, but it may have been around 9:30 as I woke up to missed text messages from around 9:35 pm. All I know is that around 12:30 am my pop picked up the phone and called me from Germany to wish me a Merry Christmas since he was already celebrating. It was like I wasn’t even tired anymore and we talked for awhile to celebrate the day. After talking to my dad, I was able to catch a few more ZZZZZZs and managed to sleep through the many mass Christmas texts that started rolling in from friends and loved ones on the east coast. I can’t lie that you really feel the love from your family and friends during the holidays especially when you are separated by distance.

Even after not getting some of the things that were on my Christmas Wishlist such as an autographed copy of a Blankman DVD or an Alabama Crimson Tide Snuggie. All jokes aside I couldn't be happier because of the gifts that I have realized not just on this Christmas but everyday that I live. When I talked to my mother today she gave me the greatest gift that I could ever receive in telling me that I was an amazing son, brother and uncle. It was in that moment that I was so very blessed to understand the gift that I have been given and the gift I am to those around me.

So as we think about the gifts that we are giving and receiving this holiday season what is the common theme? I am willing to bet that they all contain care and concern for the recipient. The things that were wrapped were material, but this holiday was about the spirit of giving. There was much more given this holiday season that you could never put a price on. There were phone calls and visits that come this time of year that brighten the lives of so many.

As you prepare to enjoy the rest of this wonderful Christmas holiday, I wish you and your family many blessings now and always. My gift to you always will be my friendship and love as that's the greatest gift that I could ever give. Don't forget that you are on the cusp of amazing, but you have to be willing to give of yourself to get there. Now is not the time to be scared and hold back on the things that you can give to those around you. We can never become the best if we are comfortable in the role of the being best there never was. There's no better time than now!!

So I asked myself a few questions as I prepare to end 2010 and get even better in 2011.

What makes a good gift? What is the greatest gift that you have ever given at any point in your life? What is the greatest gift that you have ever received? Are you willing yo share your gift with others? Are you using your gifts in the right way?


“The greatest gift is a portion of thyself.”

Ralph Waldo Emerson

“Love is, above all, the gift of oneself”

-Jean Anouilh

“The best gift you can give is a hug: one size fits all and no one ever minds if you return it”

“Life is the first gift, love is the second, and understanding the third”

-Marge Piercy

“Remember, the greatest gift is not found in a store nor under a tree, but in the hearts of true friends.”

“I have learned that to have a good friend is the purest of all God's gifts, for it is a love that has no exchange of payment”

-Frances Farmer

“Everyone is gifted - but some people never open their package”

“The greatest gift is to give people your enlightenment, to share it. It has to be the greatest.”

-Buddha

Saturday Evening Thoughts on Worth 12/18/10

Relaxing on a lazy Saturday and watching the sunset on what was another beautiful day in the Valley of the Sun. This time next week, we will be in the midst of enjoying the christmas holiday. You can't travel anywhere or talk to anyone without being reminded about the holiday season.

This is a great time of the year to enjoy friends and family. There's probably no shortage of 'Remember the Reason for the Season' comments everywhere you go these days. What is it about the time period from thanksgiving through christmas that makes people remember their giving spirit?

The spirit of giving is running rampant through all of our lives right now. Even when the holiday season is not present, the spirit of giving should always be a part of our lives.

As I started to think about the giving spirit, my thoughts began to revolve around the term worth. It's quite interesting that I have been involved in a lot of conversations lately where people have been questioning their worth and if some things were worth it.
Mainly these conversations have been centered around relationships on many levels: casual friendships, employer/employee, boyfriend/girlfriend, and husband/wife. As I continued to listen to the conversations, I began to think that a lot of people don't really understand the concept of worth.

There aren't many things that we do in life that don't involve some sort of giving. We have to do a better job of understanding the worth to ourselves as the giver and what it is worth to the recipient. As you think of giving, most people will think of giving of money, time, and love first. Looking at our lives there is so much that we are able to give that the list encompasses almost everything, but we have to be careful in our giving because we can often be disappointed in a lack of appreciation shown.

Giving of yourself to anyone or anything is probably one of the greatest things that we can give to the world, and you have to remember that the world only gets what you allow it to have.

Do you know your worth? Do others know your worth? What is your time worth? Have you ever thought about what you give to others and the worth of the gift? Have you ever given something to someone/something that wasn't worthy? Is where you are headed in life worth the trouble? Lastly, is the juice worth the squeeze?

As you enjoy your weekend and prepare for a safe holiday season, I remind you that amazing is just around the corner so be ready for it.

“There are no shortcuts to any place worth going.”

-Beverly Sills

“Nothing that is worth knowing can be taught.”

-Oscar Wilde

“What makes life worth living is knowing that one day you'll wake up and find the person that makes you happier than anything in the whole world. So don't ever lose hope and give up, everything turns out okay and the good guy always wins.”

“Only a life lived for others is worth living”

-Albert Einstein

“Our choices in life are made according to our sense of our own worth”

-Kaylan Pickford

“Among Life's precious jewels, Genuine and rare, The one that we call friendship Has worth beyond compare.”
“Worry not that no one knows of you; seek to be worth knowing.”

-Confucius

“Somewhere there's someone who dreams of your smile, and finds in your presence that life is worth while. So when you are lonely, remember it's true: Somebody, somewhere is thinking of you.”

Friday Evening Thoughts - What's below the Surface 12/10/10

There's really only one way for me to start this off and that's by saying, "Another beautiful day in the land of the living!" I couldn't think of any other way to start off because I am so
thankful to see another day and have yet another opportunity to get this thing we call life right. Waking up this morning I knew that I wasn't going to have all the right answers or say the right things, but if/when I do wake up I am going to put my best foot forward.

Before, I move to far forward, I do want to thank you for the prayers sent up for my family and extended family with the recent passing of a loved one. Even in the midst of grieving there are still positives that seem to come out and provide comfort.

It really doesn't take much for my mind to get running and after a few conversations/interactions with a few people my mind is going full speed. As we are in the holiday season I am starting to see people who are preaching the good will towards all men and thinking of other mantra. I often wonder when I see this from certain people where was this attitude in the middle of March or July. The holidays always tend to bring the caring nature out of people. I wonder how different the world might be if the attitudes we have during the holiday season managed to carry over throughout the entire year. Hmmmm

As I continued to let my thoughts roam a little more the term surface got stuck in my head. I started to think about my experiences growing up and the holiday season. I wonder how many times as a child I became overly excited about a gift that appeared to be wrapped in a better package or in a bigger box. How often was I disappointed because I focused on what I could see on the surface because the real treasure was beneath the surface.

As I think about it, most of our decisions are based on what we are able to see on the surface and it's at that point when we determine if we want to see what's below the surface. We have to remember the iceberg concept as we deal with people and situations as there is only so much that we can see at any given time. For example, I have been asked again about finding a special person to spend my life with and I have a new answer to the question. I can be easily impressed by what I can see on the surface in a person's appearance, but can I close my eyes having a conversation with them and still be impressed with their personality, attitude, and spirit. When I find someone like that I will definitely excited about the future.

As you prepare to enjoy your weekend, I want to remind you to always take a couple of moments to look beyond the surface if you feel it's warranted. Amazing is just around the corner and every now and then you need to look just a little below the surface to find it.
When you meet people does what you see stop at the surface? What is it that makes you curious about what's below the surface? Have you ever been mistaken by what you were able to see on the surface? When people look at you, what do they see on the surface?

“Character is like the foundation of a house - it is below the surface.”

“Be like a duck. Calm on the surface, but always paddling like the dickens underneath.”

-Michael Caine

“Keep looking below surface appearances. Don't shrink from doing so just because you might not like what you find.”

-Colin Powell

“Behavior which appears superficially correct but is intrinsically corrupt always irritates those who see below the surface”

-James Bryant Conant

“Do not hover always on the surface of things, nor take up suddenly, with mere appearances; but penetrate into the depth of matters, as far as your time and circumstances allow, especially in those things which relate to your profession”

-Isaac Watts

“Few people even scratch the surface, much less exhaust the contemplation of their own experience.”

-Randolph Bourne

“There are two sorts of curiosity - the momentary and the permanent. The momentary is concerned with the odd appearance on the surface of things. The permanent is attracted by the amazing and consecutive life that flows on beneath the surface of things.”

-Robert Lynd

Friday Evening Thoughts on Gratitude 12/3/10

Friday evening and I am in the midst of enjoying some of my best times. It's not surprising that I find myself the happiest when I am not at work and in the company of people that genuinely care about me. The day was pretty relaxing as I didn't have to work today.

Today I managed to put a smile or two on the faces of a few people. There could be a few more, but I can only account for some of my actions that directly resulted in a smile or two. Like most mornings, I started my day with a little reflection on where my life is currently and found some quotes to share with those in my circle. When I first started sending the daily quotes out several years ago, I never envisioned the impact that they would have years later. It's gotten to the point that there are people that look forward to receiving them and the quotes have become a part of their day.

As I look back at some of things that I do, people remind me of how they appreciate me being a nice guy. I can only say thanks as its a product how of I was raised and what I learned from those that I spend a lot of time with. I talked on the phone to my Aunt Loretta today and she was just calling to tell me thanks for calling just to say hi every now and then. She said thanks for the quotes and she just appreciated me for who I am.

So as I started thinking about talking to my aunt and seeing the smile on my friend's face when I surprised her by bringing her lunch the made me realize that its okay to be a nice guy. I can honestly say that I try my best to treat people like I want to treated. I don't take actions based on any potential reciprocation.

So I found myself sitting here with thoughts of gratitude and asked myself a few questions.

What does gratitude mean to you? Are you nice because you want people to show gratitude toward you? If people don't show you gratitude are you no longer nice? What are you doing that you would expect people to show gratitude toward? How are you showing gratitude? Why?

At the end of the day, I would like to think that these questions that I posed to myself along with the quotes below may inspire something within you as I know it already has in me.

As you move forward and prepare to enjoy your weekend, I trust that you will embrace the opportunity to have many amazing moments. Enjoy life to the fullest and don't let any opportunities slip out of your hands since tomorrow has the potential to not be like today was.

“Learn everything you can, anytime you can, from anyone you can - there will always come a time when you will be grateful you did.”

-Sarah Caldwell

“Feeling gratitude and not expressing it is like wrapping a present and not giving it.”

-William Arthur Ward

“Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today, and creates a vision for tomorrow.”

“Silent gratitude isn't much use to anyone.”

-Gladys Browyn Stern

“Develop an attitude of gratitude, and give thanks for everything that happens to you, knowing that every step forward is a step toward achieving something bigger and better than your current situation.”

-Brian Tracy

“Gratitude helps you to grow and expand; gratitude brings joy and laughter into your life and into the lives of all those around you.”

-Eileen Caddy

“Gratitude is one of the least articulate of the emotions, especially when it is deep”

-Felix Frankfurter

“Gratitude preserves old friendships, and procures new.”

Thanksgiving Thoughts on Grateful 11/25/10

I woke up this morning and all I could say was thank you and that I am grateful for the opportunity to see another day. I barely opened my eyes this morning and I was able to see how many people were able to get up before me and wish me a happy thanksgiving. It’s amazing how the holidays roll around and you are reminded about all the things and people that you are grateful for in our lives.

In our daily lives we are often so busy or so involved in things that we forget to take a moment to appreciate everything that our life is comprised of. I couldn’t help but think about being grateful for the opportunities that we have to make a difference in the lives of others. Several things happened so far today that gave me a different perspective not just on thanksgiving, but how I celebrate everyday of my life.
Thanksgiving is traditionally associated with food and football, and today is no different. Although, if you were watching football earlier there was a story on Chris Henry (former football player for the Cincinnati Bengals) who passed away last year talking about his life. While it was a very unfortunate event losing a loved one, the story centered on what his mother did in the face of the tragedy. At the time of his passing his mother made the decision that based on her son’s physical condition his organs could help give some others a second chance. There were some individuals who had been waiting on the transplant lists for quite a while and she was able to help four individuals by donating the Chris’s lungs, kidneys, liver, and pancreas.

The story became very touching as they showed her meeting the families for the first time and saying that they were now a part of her family as the spirit of her son was living through them now. While a tragic loss, Chris’s mother turned this experience into a positive for others because she was grateful that her son was in the physical condition he was to help these individuals that he never had the chance to meet.

So after a conversation I had with a friend of mine this morning as they were telling me how thankful that they were for my friendship I continued to think about a few things.

What does it mean to be grateful? What are you grateful for? Are you taking advantage of the things that make you grateful? Are you grateful without action?

At this very moment, I can tell you that I am grateful for everything in my life good and bad. The bad things actually are a blessing since they really make you realize how grateful you are for the learning experiences and opportunity to stay humble.

On this Thanksgiving 2010, I am grateful that you are a part of my life and that I can share my thoughts with you. Have a blessed holiday while enjoying the time spent with family, friends, and loved ones. Enjoy today for what it is, as you don’t know what tomorrow may bring.

“A friend is one with whom you are comfortable, to whom you are loyal, through whom you are blessed, and for whom you are grateful.”

-William Arthur Ward

“When you are grateful fear disappears and abundance appears”

-Anthony Robbins

“Each day offers us the gift of being a special occasion if we can simply learn that as well as giving, it is blessed to receive with grace and a grateful heart.”

-Sarah Ban Breathnach

“Let us be grateful to people who make us happy; they are the charming gardeners who make our souls blossom.”

-Marcel Proust

“When we are grateful for the good we already have, we attract more good into our life. On the other hand, when we are ungrateful, we tend to shut ourselves off from the good we might otherwise experience.”

-Margaret Stortz

“Given the amount of unjust suffering and unhappiness in the world, I am deeply grateful for, sometimes even perplexed by, how much misery I have been spared.”

-Dennis Prager

Friday Afternoon Thoughts on Being Better 11/12/10

The end of another week is here and I am preparing to enjoy the weekend. Seems as it gets closer to the end of the year the weeks drag on a little bit. Even with that I still find a lot to gain from all of my experiences. Everyday it seems I am learning more and more to embrace all the situations that I encounter as they are all learning experiences. As long as each and every one of us has an opportunity to see another day, we will be presented with an opportunity to learn at some point. Whether one chooses to or not depends on the individual.

I am starting to see my own growth right before my eyes in my decision making and self-awareness. The self-awareness piece has become quite a big deal for me as often times other people's perception of you becomes their reality. As I recently was reminded through my conversations with my baby sister that she was always watching. Sometimes we forget that we are always on stage regardless of the time of day or the place that we are at. Those around you can see you and often have a critique of what they think can make you better. At the end of the day, its all about growth in our lives.

Probably wondering where I am headed with all this, but some thoughts and questions started to form in my head.

Are you okay with being good or are you ready to be better? Are you willing to do what it takes to get better? Are you getting better for yourself? Others? Are you aware of what can be better? Are you taking an active role in making others better?

As you prepare to enjoy your weekend, I ask that you try to make it better than your last. I also ask you to look at ways that you can make things even better for those around you as there are young people that are in need you sharing your experiences with them. I know that I am a better person because people cared enough to want me to be better in many aspects of my life.

I am leaving you with some quotes to enjoy and asking you to pray for a friend of mine along with their family and extended family with the recent loss of a loved one.

“If most of us are ashamed of shabby clothes and shoddy furniture, let us be more ashamed of shabby ideas and shoddy philosophies... It would be a sad situation if the wrapper were better than the meat wrapped inside it.”

-Albert Einstein

“The reason people find it so hard to be happy is that they always see the past better than it was, the present worse than it is, and the future less resolved than it will be”

-Marcel Pagnol

“Don't wish it were easier, wish you were better.”

-Jim Rohn

“Better the man that conquer a thousand thousand men is the one who conquer one, himself.”

-Buddha

“Love what you do. Believe in your instincts. And you'd better be able to pick yourself up and brush yourself off every day.”

“It is better to keep a friend from falling than to help him up”

“You must constantly ask yourself these questions: Who am I around? What are they doing to me? What have they got me reading? What have they got me saying? Where do they have me going? What do they have me thinking? And most important, what do they have me becoming? Then ask yourself the big question: Is that okay? Your life does not get better by chance, it gets better by change.”

-Jim Rohn

“It is better to conquer yourself than to win a thousand battles. Then the victory is yours. It cannot be taken from you, not by angels or by demons, heaven or hell.”

-Buddha

Friday Morning Thoughts on Connected 11/5/10

The end of another week and I can't tell you how excited I was to see Friday. This isn't just a normal Friday, but a special one in my eyes as my baby sister turns Twenty-Five years old today. Wow is all I can say as it has been an interesting 25 years with this wonderful young lady.

I could easily sit here talking about my week and where I currently am, but the last 25 years of my life with my sister has me thinking about some things. My sister and I are eight years apart and growing up I always felt that we weren't really that connected based on us being in different stages of our lives. I always remember having to watch her as that's what "BIG BROTHERS" do, but I never really remembered sitting down talking with her about a lot of stuff and enjoying conversations. I say this because by the time we were able to start having those conversations, I was graduating from high school and left Germany.

Although, I felt like I really didn't have a great connection with my little sister early on, she reminded me recently that we had a better connection than I thought. My lil sister recently told me that she was always watching and listening to me from the very beginning and learned a lot from me. I can honestly say that I was quite touched hearing this from her and felt like such an amazing brother.

So it's no secret now where my thoughts might be headed. I have a lot of thoughts on the brain these days and my relationship with my sister started to bring me a little more clarity.

I have been having a lot of conversations lately with individuals who are asking me, "Where is the old Nicholas at? or "I don't think I know you anymore!"

There are often times in our lives that we become come disconnected from things or people. We have to take a step back every now and then to re-focus and re-energize just to make sure we are headed in the right direction.

Have you ever felt disconnected from your environment? Family? Friends? Relationships? What was the reason for the disconnect? Was there a change somewhere? How did you reconnect?

Again, I say thank you for allowing me to connect with you again and share my thoughts with you. Make it an amazing day that leads to an amazing weekend.

“If you limit your choices only to what seems possible or reasonable, you disconnect yourself from what you truly want, and all that is left is compromise.”

-Robert Fritz

“Have you ever felt like a phone call that's been disconnected?”

-Shannon Doherty

“Success seems to be connected with action. Successful people keep moving. They make mistakes, but they don't quit.”

-Conrad Hilton

“It is impossible to win the great prizes of life without running risks, and the greatest of all prizes are those connected with the home”

-Theodore Roosevelt

“Everything you want in life has a price connected to it. There's a price to pay if you want to make things better, a price to pay just for leaving things as they are, a price for everything.”

-Harry Browne

“From the standpoint of daily life, however, there is one thing we do know: that we are here for the sake of each other - above all for those upon whose smile and well-being our own happiness depends, and also for the countless unknown souls with whose fate we are connected by a bond of sympathy. Many times a day I realize how much my own outer and inner life is built upon the labors of my fellow men, both living and dead, and how earnestly I must exert myself in order to give in return as much as I have received.”

-Albert Einstein

Wednesday, May 11, 2011

Friday Afternoon Thoughts on Special 10/22/10

Another relaxing Friday and I am enjoying my day off. I must say that there is no better feeling than taking time away to recharge and prepare yourself for some amazing things that are headed your way. Right this minute I am trying my best to bring happy thoughts my way as it has been a very long and draining week.

I have a very heavy heart right now as I send many thoughts and prayers out to the family of a special friend who I have known for over 11 years. Earlier this week they were involved in an accident which took the life her brother. As my family and extended family/friends, I ask that you pray for her and her family to carry through this difficult time.

The passing of anyone is never an easy thing to deal with especially a loved one. As friends/loved ones we can be there for them and over our love, support, and empathy to help them get through this time.

Over the last couple days I have been doing some reflecting and my mind has been wrapped around a few things that I am going to get into right now. I had a few conversations this week via email/phone with my mom this week and I can honestly say that she made me feel special to be her son. I think it may have a lot to do with me being her first born and the relationship that we have nurtured as mother/son and then as friends over the last 32 years.

As I thought about my mother making me feel special, I began to think about special and how it seems like my mother always makes other people feel special. It wasn't just me, but there is just something about the way my mother makes people feel. I don't think she realizes all the things she does, its the way that she is able to be there for you. Caring and funny that's what she is cause she is more than just a mom to me. If you have ever met her you can probably agree with this, cause it seems like she has to be special to have helped mold me into the man that I am.
So I started to wonder about a few things surrounding 'special' and began asking myself a few questions. How do you define special? What is it about you that makes you special? Do you view someone(s) as special? Why are they special to you? What makes a moment special? How is it that you hold onto those special moments?

Although it has been an emotionally draining week with some different things I have been through I did welcome the opportunity to visit with the young men in my leadership academy for a special session today. I used the word special because I think the event we had today was special and I recognize it for what it was. We were originally scheduled to have 3 guest speakers, but due to some unforeseen things this morning we were only going to have one. So I picked up the phone and contacted a friend on a whim who was available and excited to a part of this mentoring event. Again I say the event was special cause everyone could feel that there was a higher power involved to make all this happen. It was just amazing to see two men standing in front of these young men having two very similar conversations that complemented the other like it was planned that way.

As you can see from my example, sometimes the simplest things in life just might be a special moment for you and others. I will remind you always to show appreciation to those in your life as they may be special to you even if they aren't to others. Everyone that I have in my life is special to me. I want to say thank you to Derrick and Ethan for your words that help create yet another special moment for me and others.

Heading into the weekend, enjoy the time spent with friends and family as it is precious. Welcome amazing into your life in whatever capacity you can allow.

“I'd rather have a moment of wonderful than a lifetime of nothing special.”

“Welcome every morning with a smile. Look on the new day as another special gift from your Creator, another golden opportunity to complete what you were unable to finish yesterday. Be a self-starter. Let your first hour set the theme of success and positive action that is certain to echo through your entire day. Today will never happen again. Don't waste it with a false start or no start at all. You were not born to fail.”

-Og Mandino

“Life becomes precious and more special to us when we look for the little everyday miracles and get excited about the privileges of simply being human”

-Tim Hansel

“The friends who grew up with you deserve a special respect- the ones who stuck by you shoulder to shoulder, in a time when nothing was certain, all life lay ahead, and every road led home.”

“It doesn't require a special day to express how much I Love You... if every ordinary day is more than special when I am with you.”

“Will you ever? I don’t think you will ever fully understand how you've touched my life and made me who I am.I don't think you could ever know just how truly special you are that even on the darkest nights you are my brightest star.”

-Erica Jong

“No matter what age you are, or what your circumstances might be, you are special, and you still have something unique to offer. Your life, because of who you are, has meaning.”

-Barbara De Angelis

Sunday Evening Reflections on the Sweetest Day 10/17/10

Finally made it to Sunday Evening and I can say this week was longer than normal. I guess it had a lot to do with me being a little under the weather and down and out for a minute. I think I am getting back to normal and feeling almost like my normal self.

Yesterday, was the Sweetest Day and I can honestly say that I tried to do some things to recognize the holiday.

Sweetest Day is an observance celebrated primarily in the Great Lakes region, and parts of the Northeast United States, on the third Saturday in October. Once known as a day to spread love and cheer to the unfortunate, this popular holiday in the northern U.S. is now known as a day to show affection to the ones in your life whom you like. It is described by Retail Confectioners International as an "occasion which offers all of us an opportunity to remember not only the sick, aged and orphaned, but also friends, relatives and associates whose helpfulness and kindness we have enjoyed."

In thinking about the Sweetest Day, I talked with my mother and also talked/texted a few other special people in my life to let them know that I appreciated them. Life is something that happens and you never know what life will throw at you next. I say this as I was at Chick-Fil-A yesterday picking up my yogurt for the next two mornings and was presented some sad news. One of the patrons that I run into from time to time as I greeted him whispers in my ear that his brother in California passed away last night. At that moment, I didn't know what to say or what to do other than offer my condolences and let them know that I would pray for them and their family.

At that moment I realized how important it is to enjoy today for what it is and appreciate everything that today has for you. Whether that's telling someone you love them or just letting them know that you care, there's no better time than now to do it. I think about this young man that I only know from our visits at Chick-Fil-A, but I showed empathy for his situation in sharing a moment sympathy with him and stating that I would pray for he and his family.

As I think of my experience yesterday and I some other things I have dealt with recently I began to wonder a few things.

Where would the world be if there were more selfless acts instead of selfish acts? When people see you, do they see selfless or selfish?

As we end this Sweetest Day weekend, I trust that you are well prepared to begin an amazing week. We as a society can be sweet and caring even without being reminded by holiday that tells us to be that way. I have no doubts in my mind that you are ready to do something nice for your fellow man/woman. Remember you are standing at the front door of amazing and wouldn't it be something if you walked through the door with someone.

“An act of goodness is of itself an act of happiness. No reward coming after the event can compare with the sweet reward that went with it.”

-Maurice Maeterlinck

“By hating that person, you have lost something very sweet in yourself.”

-Sri Chinmoy

"Change in all things is sweet."

-Aristotle
 
"Friendship is always a sweet responsibility, never an opportunity."

-Kahlil Gibran

"Half the pleasure of solitude comes from having with us some friend to whom we can say how sweet solitude is."

-William Jay

"It is the sweet, simple things of life which are the real ones after all."

-Laura Ingalls Wilder

Hump-Day Thoughts on Charity 10/13/10

Another hump day is here and I am really trying very hard to get over the hump. This probably isn?t a regular hump day for me as I have been under the weather for the last two days. I am starting to think that my immune system may have gotten a little weak over the last several days and it was my adrenaline that kept me going through the weekend.

This past weekend was amazing as usual and culminated with a big Arizona Cardinals victory over the New Orleans Saints. This particular Sunday there were a lot of people in the Phoenix area for the game as well as the Susan G. Komen Breast Cancer Awareness walk. Although I didn?t participate in the walk, I was able to raise some money for the cause while tailgating at the Cardinals game.

While I went to the game to have fun with my friends and extended family, I took the time out to talk with others and fill a jar with money going toward breast cancer awareness. Breast Cancer Awareness Month is really important to me as my great-grandmother survived it many years ago as well as friends and members of my extended family.

As I was thinking about how I could help, I started to think about charity and why people support certain things. In my case it?s clear as I have been touched personally in a few cases and just know the impact of making others aware of some things.

What are the causes that you feel strongly about? What is it that connects you to those things? What role does charity play in your life? Do you give of your time? Resources?

We are in the homestretch of the week and I send good thoughts your way as you finish your week out strong.

?The life of a man consists not in seeing visions and in dreaming dreams, but in active charity and in willing service?

-Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

?Every good act is charity. A man's true wealth hereafter is the good that he does in this world to his fellows.?

-Moliere

?True charity is the desire to be useful to others without thought of recompense?

-Emanuel Swedenborg

?Character and personal force are the only investments worth anything?

-Walt Whitman

?A bone to the dog is not charity. Charity is the bone shared with the dog, when you are just as hungry as the dog.?

-Jack London